Archive for June, 2009

Our Fathers Day Outting [A Week Later]…

Tuesday, June 30th, 2009

Well it’s finally that time of year again… I’m not talking about the Dead Heat of Summer, and No I’m not talking about the Forth of July, and No I’m not talking about Swim season either! It’s that time of year folks…. the Era of JASON!

Well with less than 24hrs left, I’m kinda worried about what’s in store for this year… As many of you in the past might have known but all my worst luck comes during the months of July thru November… but mainly my troubles seem to be financial… Although I have been struggling a bit, I think I’ll be okay once July starts [5 paychecks will help with that]… But also I’m worried about being so down lately… I don’t know really what’s up with me, but I’ve been quite down since everything that has happened over the past few months… I think things might start turning around, but it’s still been difficult…

I have been trying lately to get out and about… Even meet some new people and make new friends… But mainly I’ve been trying to get out of the house for as cheap as possible… However, this past weekened I treated my father to a round of golf at the Raven Golf Club in South Phoenix… It was nice, but I ended up getting up at 5:45AM and was at the course by 6:30AM… Erik and his father showed up so we had a really fun group going… Although it was a long day, and it got up into the mid 100′s, it was nice to hang out with just the guys… The day really wore on a lot of us, and even I had to quit playing after 14 holes because I almost ended up with heat Stroke, but next time we go I’m sure 9 holes will be fine! I have pictures posted already…

The rest of the weekend I kinda kept to myself, really I was kinda just relaxing and resting my back up… I’m hopefully almost done with going to these chiropractor appointments and missing work… I’m really kinda tired of it all… I’d like to get things back to normal, and hopefully they will soon enough… Not to mention, I’ve been toying around with the idea of maybe thinking of getting back into the dating pool… I’m not ready at this exact moment, but kinda getting it set in my mind that I’m honestly thinking of who would be an ideal person to be with… I know it kinda sounds imbecilic, but I’m really trying to find a person for me… I’m really kinda tired of the dating scene, and really just want a person to spend the rest of my life with and as most of you know my ultimate goal is to have a family of my own… But it seems my attempts keep putting me further and further from that…

All in all, I’m kinda worried about the ERA of JASON coming up, but in the same instance I see many things going my way but also very cautious because I’m still uncertain what really lies around the next corner… Well Take a deep breath everyone, we’re going to dive right in!

[ Here I go again on my Own! ]

Posted in 2009 | Comments Off

Fathers day…

Wednesday, June 24th, 2009

Well it’s the final Countdown for the ERA of JASON, so Jasyn.com is getting prepared!

Sorry for the delay in this entry, kinda got caught up in a few things but we’re back on track here at Jasyn.com! woot woot! Well I think things are still a little hectic for me, but I do see the light at the end of the tunnel [and for once it's not a train!]… Money has been tight, even I’ve had to cut back on spending big time!!! It’s always happens this time of the month where Rent and other bills kinda pile up…. But yet I’m not done quite yet…

Well this past weekend was nice and relaxing for a change. Friday after work I met up with my friend Michelle and we headed over to the Scottsdale 6 Drive-in. We ended seeing ‘The Hangover’ which I have to admit, was a good movie! Then on Saturday I ended up just kicking back and watching South Park all day pretty much. Katie did come by and we hung out for a little bit, but not for very long. After that I just kept going from episode to episode and actually I didn’t get to sleep til 4am! Sunday I did have to do laundry, but my cousin stopped by a bit and we had a beer and chilled out a bit…

So even though Sunday was fathers day, for once I was okay… My mother and Jenn wished me a happy fathers day, which this year didn’t bother me… ever since I wrote that letter to Andrew I’ve felt much better about the situation… I’m really glad I did it, but to those who read it, I do apologize that I didn’t give any forewarning… I know it kinda brought a couple of you to tears, and that was not my intention… But that entry is not safely in the archives…

I wasn’t able to see my father this past Sunday, so Erik and I came up with an idea for our Fathers and that was to have our own golf outing! So next Saturday, we are all going out to the Raven at South Mountain to go for round of 18 holes in a free for all… I started by grabbing my old clubs and practicing yesterday at the course around the block from me… I’m sore today, but it was good that I didn’t completely threw out my back lol… But I’m glad that the chiropractors appointments are going as well as they are… But I’ll have photos and maybe even a video of next week’s golf match… But until that time; just keep swinging! lol

[FORE!]

Posted in 2009 | Comments Off

A Letter to My Son

Monday, June 15th, 2009

Well I hope everyone is having a good June and hope that everything is on the up and up! I’m going to do things a little differently this entry. Fathers day is coming up and I’ve been rather down lately, however I came up with an idea to write a letter to my son in hopes to finally move on and get my life back on track once again. I hope you all understand… Thanks for continuing to read :)

To My Dearest Son Andrew,

I first want to say that you are a blessing to me, that you are my son and will always be such now and forever, however my dearest Andrew, I have mourned your passing for the past 2 years now. I wanted to so badly have you in my arms and embrace you as a father should always be able to embrace his own flesh and blood, and for someone who has only in my life for only a day, your memory and my love for you will always remain til the day I also pass from this life as well.

My son, I feel for these past two years like as if your death was somehow my responsibility. That your death as a direct result of somehow my sins that have come to hurt the ones I love. I bore your death like a cross that I had to bare with me every day. I look back and realize now that I made the decicions that I did was to ultimately protect you from a brutal and harsh life that would only result in more pain and suffering that you would have experienced. Andrew, I was presented with a decision that is almost impossible decision that no father should ever be presented with, a decision with no real right answer. To either kill their son to prevent them more pain, or to let them live and chance their suffering for the remaining moments of life. I had to make a decision on the spot Andrew, I had no chance to think, I know in my head I made the right decision, but in my heart I feel as if I never gave you the chance to live. What has plagued my mind the last two years is that the one decision I had to make as a father, was to end the life of my son.

Andrew, I am telling you all this because after 2 years of tears and the oceans it has created in my heart, I’m ready to finally move forward. I can never replace you, and you will always have a place in my heart, but Andrew, I need to stop crying for you now. My son, for someone who has only been in my life for one day, you will leave an impact that will last my lifetime. Andrew, I have my future ahead of me. So again a father must make an impossible choice, Andrew I must stop crying for you and mourning your death. I’m sorry. If you were alive today, I’d do anything for you and help you develop into the man I know you could be, but as painful as it is that will never happen now. So please forgive me so that I can pass that experience to your brothers or sisters.

Andrew, your memory will always live on within myself and your mother, I love you so much that my words will never express. This is something I need to do for me to move on my son. I’m telling you all this in hopes that you will understand that I’m ready. I’m ready to keep you in my past instead of hoping for a future with you, I’m ready to start thinking of trying to start a familiy again; and in order for me to give my love and devotion to them I need to save my tears from you. I do not know if you will understand this, if you will forgive me, or if you’ll even see this; but please understand this decision is to help your father start a new life. Andrew, my heart has been broken but now it is time for me to pick up the pieces. Thank you Andrew, you have given me the greatest gift a son can give to his father, and that was showing me what kind man that I have become! For that I’m eternally grateful.

With all My Love,

Your Father
Jasyn

Posted in 2009, Top Entries | Comments Off

Another Era of JASON Coming!

Friday, June 12th, 2009

Well we’re back on the bandwagon here at Jasyn.com.

Hello everyone, and thank you for your continued patience with waiting for these entries… I know you all like to read this with your morning coffee and smoke, but now we’re back for more!!! Well in the last few weeks since my BBQ I’ve been keeping busy, hanging with friends, going out and playing poker, ect… but I’ve been doing okay since Blair and I split up… It has been nice, but I’ve been getting a little lazy on the cleaning, but been busy with hanging with Katie and Jaclyn and other friends as well so I’m spread a little thin, but it’s all good…

Well getting back into the swing of things, I’ve kinda been a bit down lately with everything that has happened over the past few months, but I feel as if a new change is coming in that should be great… Although with that being said, we are still only 18 days from the ERA of JASON… now for those of you that are unfamiliar with the ERA of JASON, if you take the first letter of every month from July thru November, it spells JASON [no I don't make this stuff up and NO I don't have too much time on my hands] and during these months I usually have the worst luck of the year… as my friend Alan would say, ‘You can’t make it up’ and that’s true… Well other than last year, something has always happened… you can even check the archives and see for yourself… but with that looming I’ve been kinda weary of what is actually around the corner…

But on a happier note, over the past couple months, I’ve rekindled some old friendships, and strengthen some of my current friendships even further… It’s been nice to have the free time to accomplish so much with my ‘social circle’ but it’s also been nice to finally surround myself with quality people that actually care about my well being… I think that’s important…

Well that’s pretty much it for this entry… not as blockbuster as my last couple have been, but least I’ll be getting back into more and get back to my regular entries as normal… Catch you all later!!!

[ Til the ERA of JASON! ]

Posted in 2009 | Comments Off